Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
×

:iconxxsabrinaseductionxx: More from xxsabrinaseductionxx


More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
November 30, 2008
File Size
3.3 KB
Thumb

Stats

Views
4,297
Favourites
8 (who?)
Comments
146
×
hi!111!!1!11 my carckter name is sora!111! all ninjaz r my frndz and dey r awsum! 2day is the shoeneen examz, and 2day i watned to git redy!!1!! i put on a tube top with skullz on the bwubz it was blak and the skullz were white inst dat is so cute and kawai i luv it!1 i neenja replublic wich is lyke de best store evaaa . i put on a gene skrit and it loked so cute rite? i then put on my uggz witch are so cute i luved the gothik stye. She thinks itz so kewl.

she walkd 2school in the moning and saw all the othr students gatherd around the building. All d HAWTTTT genin boyz were gathered around her becasue she waz so CUTE. Sora haz long blund heir and bright blou eyez.It atracted everywon in konoha to her. Most uv all, it attracted Narutioand saskue making sakura jellos. Every girl wuz jellos becasue she wuz sooo cute and smrt and athaletic, She stud next 2 Sauceke, her double d bwubs in frontof him. He blusheed and sed 'hi sora. how r u today' she reasponded with a smile and sed 'i'm fine. you look awsum today'.
all uv a sudden, sauske strted getting beat up bi naruto. "YOU TOK HER AWAY FRM ME!!!!!1"
Sasuke jmp and made narto miss his attaks. but this made hm go torwards Sora and hit her. That wuz when all the guys beat him ^ for hurtingher. 'are u alryte?' sauskwe asked.

swe starterd cryin an sauce que got sa mad an saf. 'imma keel u nartyo saske yerred. all teh boyz run afert narto an beat him up. sora waz 2 beuti full wen she crid. all teh boyz locked at her wit blushin face. teh examd strated an sora wen to the big rm. her kute blond hair waz floowing with each step. 'oh noes she siad 'i hav two fight sakoora. she iz mad cuz sora waz so cutee and tat sauceke leiks hur. thye startes ot fight. sakoora ran at the wonreful sora, wat a stoopid mov rite? sora waz a A+ stoodent so shz was smaridle!!!!!4678. sora queckly defrected itbi jus movin 2 twwe side. ha u cunt hert meh. sora pulled out a kooney an instanely defeated sakoora. all teh boyz cheared an sauceke hudged her. blushin she hug bak and her big bwoobs wer pushin on sauce ke and he blushed to, it waz his tern 2 fite nawrooto. sora iz so kute wen she iz chearin formeh sauceke though she iz so cute rite?!!!12 2 adroable!($2426

nayrooootoo waz bout to ht sauceque buttt sakoora tried 2 save sauceque by goin in da way. Sakoora got hits n fell to da flor. she got bac up and tried 2 punch nayrooto in da fce but she misd and hit Sora insted.sauceque and naruuuto both went to hlp her butt she was nocked unkonstious. nayroooto gots sad n cried nxt to her as sauceque did the smrt thin and wnt 2 go get da nurse. 'NOOOO SORA!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!#! y do u hve to be dead???!!!! ur so kawai wen ur ded!.' Sauceque cam bac wit da nurse and da nurse sad dat sora waz not ded she waz just unkonstious. All da guys wer 'round her n dey locked liked dey wer bout to cry ther brans out! naroooto waz soooooooooo hapy dat Sora waz ok.! Sakoora waz snt to da prinicpals ofise. she waz MADDDDD! oh wel.... wen Sora wok up she waz wering a pink tube top n a nic short skrit .. dats cute righhht??????!!!! I bet it is!. Da nurse let her go bak to class. n sakoora waz stil in da prinicpals ofise. Sora went to clas n den.....
coment and reveiw. thanks!
Add a Comment:
 
:iconkrikrifanclub:
KriKriFanclub Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2014
FUK DOS IDDIIIIOTTTSS DIS WAS TEH BESSS TING EVVUUURRRR <333<#33333  
Reply
:iconzaeedmassani:
ZaeedMassani Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2012
No. Just no.
Reply
:iconsasusakukiss038:
sasusakukiss038 Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2011  Student Writer
Please learn to spell. Or at least find out how to give your characters some kind of.... I don't know.... depth? So far, "Sora" is a ditzy idiot that everyone in the whole world loves. Not only is your spelling equivalent to that of a two year old, but so is your ability to make an interesting, relatable character.
And another thing. When you try to type, do you just bang your head against the keyboard and hope it comes out like you want it to? Because that's what it looks like from the readers perspective. And even if you aren't good at typing, look over every sentence once you're done. If spellcheck says you spelled something that isn't in another language wrong, then it probably is.
Please don't be like that girl from My Immortal. No one wants that. And don't call everyone that gives you constructive criticism a "troll" or tell them to "gtfo". When you publish something on the internet, you're inviting people to comment on it, and that's exactly what they're going to do. If you don't want people's input, then keep it off the internet.
Reply
:iconsupergirl75:
supergirl75 Featured By Owner Aug 26, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Congratulations, you're officially the Tara Gilesbie of dA. As if fanfiction couldn't get worse.
Reply
:iconvampirenote13:
VampireNote13 Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2011  Student General Artist
Ignore others. My Immortal was the best piece of literature to grace the earth. They don't have any comprehension of TRUE art.
Reply
:iconuchiha-kiss:
uchiha-kiss Featured By Owner Sep 1, 2010  Hobbyist Artist
You know, it's really hard for a 12 year old kunoichi to have double-d boobs, because it will impair their movement, and slow them down.

The Academy doesn't have a nurse, it has medical nin.

Uggs aren't really good attire for someone living in Konoha, its described that Konoha has a somewhat hot climate, so I don't believe she'd be needing uggs, plus you really woudn't be able to use them for ass kicking. Maybe steel-toes, but those must be a little on the heavy side.

And... English Motherfucker Do you speak it?
Reply
:icondisintegratingvortex:
Sauce? ¿Qué? :iconlaughingplz:
Reply
:iconyaoitomatowolfluver:
yaoitomatowolfluver Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2010
Please, kill me now. This is complete and utter crap. I swear, my little sister, who doesn't even speak proper English could write a better story than this.


Bottom line:

Learn to write and THEN write your story, or GTFO of MY interwebz, bitch.
Reply
:iconbeyondlawliet31:
BeyondLawliet31 Featured By Owner Jun 8, 2010
guys guys guys! come on now! This is an amusing story :) it's like my immortal yes...but that's what's awesome about it! The my immortal spirit won't die and we get to read bad/entertaining stories like this one here!

Nice Job ^^
Reply
:iconbakachama:
Bakachama Featured By Owner May 2, 2010
Get some Grammer, a life, and spelling classes. I have nothing against the stoory but it hurt my eyes to read it...*never knew how bad grammer could get*
Reply
Add a Comment: